Accusatory Tone | Why did you do it like that! |
Chastising | I have told you before and you never listen. |
Combative Tone | Why are you looking at me like that? |
Commanding Language | You must complete this today! |
Condescending | I know it's hard for you but ... |
Cynical | Nobody in this company knows what they are doing. |
Defeatist | This project is going to fail. |
Dramatizing | The entire project is ruined because of you. |
Exaggerating | You are always late. |
Excessive Criticism for the Situation | Why are you ruining everything? |
Hostile | I will never do business with you again. |
Impolite | Hey you, get over here! |
Inappropriate Directness / Honesty | Your cooking is terrible. |
Inappropriately Personal Criticism | You need to work on your hairstyle. |
Insulting Tone | Come on .. get up to speed with everyone else. |
Intentionally Provoking An Emotional Response | Does your wife know you're incompetent at work? |
Judgemental | You're not good enough with people to handle that job. |
Loss of Face | [harshly admonishing someone in front of a group] |
Passive Aggressive | Most people thought your presentation was awful but I thought it was good. |
Patronizing | I think it's great that you're trying to get a promotion. |
Petty Authoritarianism | You have violated the rules of the coffee room. |
Playing a Victim | When you are late for meetings you are disrespecting me and causing me to feel stress. |
Sarcasm | Oh that's brilliant. |
Sidelining | I completed and submitted your work because I figured you wouldn't do it. |
Smug (complacent criticism of those who take risks and try) | I told you but you wouldn't listen. |
Sounding Like a Know-it-all | I will have to show you how to do it. |
Toxic Positivity | Your performance is unacceptably low so we have decided to terminate your employment. This could be a great opportunity for you to grow as a person. |
Needless Subjectivity (making it about you when there is an opportunity to be objective) | I noticed that you are always late. |
Trying to Socially Isolate Someone | Everyone says you're always late for their meetings. |
Unfair Pessimism | I just don't think you can do it. |
Unsympathetic | I know your kid was in hospital last week but your productivity really dropped for a few days there. |
Counter Examples
The following are examples of negative feedback with counterexamples that include critical, positive and pragmatic feedback.Negative | Constructive / Positive / Pragmatic |
You always make me work late. | I'm taking a night class and have family responsibilities in the evening so I have to leave work promptly at 5 from now on. |
Your handwriting is terrible. | I'm having trouble reading your writing [active silence to wait for a proposal that will resolve the situation]. |
You should have resolved this issue weeks ago. | It's been a few weeks now and we have gotten to the point where this issue needs to be resolved today or we will need to report the reason for the delay to the project board. I'd really appreciate your support on this. |
Why am I always the one who needs to clean your mess? | Can we come up with a rule or schedule for who cleans the kitchen? |
| Overview: Negative Feedback | ||
Type | ||
Definition | Feedback that is accusatory, combative, insulting, harsh or overly critical for the situation. | |
Related Concepts | ||
